When I read Aimee's latest "Adventures and Pursuits" post, I was reminded of a paper I wrote almost three years ago in an English class. I'm posting it now, just to let Aimee (and all the other young moms) know that she's (you're) not alone. I seldom made it work really smoothly... but I kept trying, just as you do. And I guess that's all that matters. That's what my kids seem to remember, not that it was perfect, but that I tried.
And besides, it was high time I put something new in my blog.
Spiritual Ducks 8 Jun 2006
I used to say, “If I ever had two days alike, in a row, I wouldn’t know how to act.” I suppose that just meant that I had felt that my life was out of my control. Add to that the fact that I’m a slow learner, requiring many repetitions of an experience to “get it,” you can see why I might struggle. Of course we all struggle, that’s why we’re here, to learn by experience. So, with the advantage of all this experience, I’d like to pass along what I’ve learned so far, to anyone who might have similar challenges.
For years, my days would start with the first child’s cry in the morning. It seemed that as I got out of bed, the day was already out of my control. And it would often go quickly downhill from there. Not until baby number five did I figure out that if I set my alarm for about half an hour before the baby usually awoke, that I could have read my scriptures, said my prayers, and maybe even gotten dressed before that first cry. Inevitably, there would still be the unexpected sickness in the night (all over their bedmate), or the mornings when I hadn’t gotten to bed until almost time for that first cry. But most mornings it worked very well, and I didn’t feel that I was running behind all day. That extra half hour of sleep that I missed in the morning was more than worth the added feeling of control throughout the day.
Being able to start my day with prayer and scriptures brought with it the added advantage of being more in tune with the spirit. How could I have passed up that special help all those years. Many nights I would pray for forgiveness for having lost my temper and in the morning would plead for the strength to “do better today,” this pattern being repeated countless times. The years of spiritual malnourishment made it so that the spirit could seldom reach me. How many promptings did I miss? How many blessings did I forfeit? How grateful I am that when I finally got my spiritual ducks in a row, the Holy Spirit was still patiently waiting.
Now, assuming that everyone wakes up healthy and happy, that’s no guarantee that a neighbor or relative might not need your help that day. There might be the dreaded “snow day”, unexpected company, or even a chance to goof off with the kids, when all the best laid plans go out the window. All of those past days of comparative normalcy will help get you through those crazy days. And the habits of prayer and scripture will hopefully be a part of you, enough that you can find a way to bring them along on those days too. Including your children, showing them how important these things are in your life, will be such a help to them in years to come. Perhaps their days will go a little smoother because of what you taught by example.
And now for me, with grandbaby number seven on the way, I find that my days can still get out of control, and often do. I’m still learning by experience, and just as slowly too. There is a whole new set of lessons to be learned , and I often find myself reviewing old ones. I know now that there are no two days alike, and isn’t that wonderful? I feel so blessed to have the Holy Spirit’s guidance and the Saviors forgiveness of my failings. What a marvelous plan our Father in Heaven had, to allow us this chance to learn and struggle.